6:07 p.m., 13.04.04
David Beckham, Sarah Marbeck and Rebecca Loos

I would like to announce something, dear friends:

I, like Sarah Marbeck and Rebecca Loos, rooted David Beckham. Right up the bum.

It was more than just sex though, he told me I was his special guy, and that Sarah and Rebecca and Victoria meant nothing to him.

It's a secret that's been burning inside me since the first time I experienced the *real* Real Madrid.

And I will reveal all the saucy details should the appropriate offer be made from the international media.

You know who to call.

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